juz wanna let u know.... SHE is still irreplacable in my heart.. THEY are still irreplacable in my heart.. avoiding is not forgetting... its a selfish way of preventing myself frm being hurt by those precious moments.. i dont want goodbyes... i dont wanna avoid anymore.. i juz hope that some day... i can snap out of it.. and have the courage to see her once more.. and see two familiar smiling faces in my profile picture.... juz like b4 and always will be... smiling faces of two besties..
its been 3 months after that amazing day... 3 months since i started college..
its fun in college... thank God i met great great great classmates =) i can tell them almost everything.. ALMOST... but there are things in this world that i can only express here..
things have changed.. people have changed... life have changed... we changed...
college life is great.. no complaints.... although i still laugh and smile a lot.. compared to the 7 yeas with u.. its so so different..
fairy tail... every time i visit our blogs.. i still feel the emptiness from that day.. that amazing yet painful day... i dont mean to bring up emo feelings here but i really have to shout out somewhere.. thats why i love shouting so much =D
theres this line in fairy tail... touching yet painful line..
~ bury the sadness of losing your loved ones , into the arms of your friends ~
i have this feeling lately... although we still hang out at least once a month.. but the feel is different.. its like we hang out juz for the sake of our promise... its just different.. maybe i m being too sensitive.. but i just miss the times we had.. so so much..
hey , if u guys are reading this.. pls dont feel offended and dont bring this topic up when we meet okay ? its me.. i dont know whats gotten into me.. seriously dont feel bad for me kay ? =)
ahhhhhh !! enough of this.. back to my own life.. anyway..... i never ever regret meeting u guys.. fairy tail ^^
bury the sadness of losing your loved ones , into the arms of your friends...
but... what if.. your loved one is actually your best friend ???
its late now... 2.50am to be exact.. these few days were fun and painful at the same time..
a lot of things happened.... i wanted time to pass by ASAP during the exams but at the same time it worries me when i think about the moment i m gonna leave my friends...
15 Dec 2010 : it was my first outing together with erza & natsu... i didnt know guilds as strong as this really exist in this harsh world... i didnt know when this fairy tail spirit started to engrave in my heart... i didnt know it was so much fun just watching a movie with u guys... i didnt know it would be so heart-warming just spending time with u guys..
16 Dec 2010 : prom nite.... all dressed up.. for me , i m juz excited that i get to spend more time with erza & natsu... i can still rmb.. the moment when we saw each other.. the laughing never stops... its crazy hanging around with u guys.. its never an ordinary day when u guys are around.. coz erza & natsu are extraordinary in my heart.. always and forever.. ^^
after that...2 weeks without seeing u guys... it was hard during night time.. cant sleep.. once i close my eyes.. i'll see ur smiling faces and have flashbacks... this went on every night.. the guitar on my phone was like a switch that stimulates my tears... my heart could do nothing but weep.. its becoz my heart was filled with memories that acts as SWORDS and FIRE frm erza & natsu... my heart was so weak...
30 Dec 2010 : finally saw u guys again... gillian.. that day when u waved at me at the train station while i was walking over to u.. i reli felt like running over and hugging u =') ... chye i missed u too.. that little natsu i gave u... hope u like it.. my handcrafting isnt very good but i made it with all my heart.. juz a simple outing with u guys changed my mood so much... in the cinema laughing all the way.. in the arcade screaming all the way... in my heart there were smiles all the way..
31 Dec 2010 : it was a crazy day as expected... we found our mirajane ^^ another guild member... that nite while counting down and roasting marshmellows beside the warm fire... i felt the warmth of friendship.. its reli a strong bond... fire , marshmellow , the moon... we used these to describe our friendship.. this is so us.. crazy but cute ^^ when the fireworks started.. 3 of us pointed the fairy tail signal to the sky.. it reminded me of the parade in fairy tail... tears came out.. erza , natsu ! even if i cant see u.. i'll be looking over u =') the time came.. we ended up hugging together.. it was my first time hugging u guys.. u know.. i just couldnt let go at that moment.. lucy finally felt like she had the keys to erza & natsu's heart.. i couldnt bare to see u guys leave..
earlier just now... i rewatched fairy tail and visited gillian's blog again.. all the posts.. chye's birthday , my birthday , the pictures , the guitar , the smiles... everything.. it hurts so much ! i had been crying for an hour while thinking back and blogging.. chye.. u've done it again.. perfect timing.. that time u helped gillian in the undang class.. this time u called and gave me hope while i was so emo.. gillian.. our next aim.. go to japan and meet hiro mashima ( FT manga artist) !! maybe we can cosplay too.. erza natsu and lucy coming to life.. my goal.. our dream ^^
although its really painful.. but i never regret meeting u guys... i m glad i get to spend the last few days of 2010 and the first moment of 2011 with u guys.. the tears flowing out are warm.. coz its the exact warm feeling coming frm my heart.. but hey ! we r the strongest team rite ?!! i believe we'll see each other very soon..i love it best when we are PLUE-ing.. i'll always rmb those smiling faces... u guys will always look over me too rite ? ^^
just like the letter in the end... my dearest friends.. u r welcomed back any time..
until we meet again.. AYE !! =')
okay okay.. i admit it.. i've been slacking off lately.. =.=
its bcoz i have ntg to write here... days in skul were almost the same everyday..
these few days not in class anyway coz whole day in the hall rehearsing for graduation..
graduation... reli sad lo... T^T
oh btw.. listen to this.. the lyrics describe my heart in words.. i can soooo relate to this song right now.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HCCCcQjxMQ4
simply love this song ^^ ♥
next ~~
i think i told jilien b4.. i was supposed to got to japan during the 2-week-holidays b4 we had our trial exams..
and u know the rest... exam = no japan... what a party pooper.. =((
anyways... my aunt went to japan... without us... =(((( cant get over it.. haiz..
but she brought us gifts !! yeah !! (^.<)v
soooooo cuteeee !!! even the packaging is nice... haih.. japanese.. what CANT they do ??
check this out -->
kawaiiiiiii ~~!!!!
ripped my heart when i opened the package..
see see !! aiyo.. sooo cute !!
aduiiii... more surprises !! haha xD
and it tastes nice too !! very milky... like the ' tiger ' biscuit we have here in malaysia.. wahh..
mum said MAYBE she'll bring me to japan nex year... cant wait !!
hmmm.. for now... keep fighting for spm ba.. yorsh !!
aza aza gambateh !!
yesterday ( thursday ) was my 1st driving lesson...
i was so so so so nervous in skul..
sum said last time she wasnt nervous at all.. until she went hands on on the wheel then only started to feel nervous...
heh for me totally vice versa... in skul so sked of it but when i grab the stering i feel like a pro driver.. haha no feel jor... xD
so aunty asked me to wait at KFC in front of my dad's clinic... then she drove me to a parking space somewhere in bangi... started explaining bout the gears and when to use the clutch and how to use it..
wahhhh it was like alien language to me.. uga uga... cant get it.. ><
experience is worth a thousand words... drive myself baru tahu... keep going round the parking lot lo... pusing pusing.. full clutch - change gear - half clutch - hold clutch - accelerate - release clutch - slow down - full clutch - change gear - release clutch slowly - accelerate ... wahaha jilien u pening adi rite ?? sengaja de.. LOL x)
honestly i think it was easy after i got the hang of it.. 10 mins later aunty taught me how to reverse adi.. 10 more mins then it was the real thing.. went out on the road.. drove all the way to bangi driving centre and aunty taught me a little bit bout side parking... then i tried going uphill.. hehe i din 死火.. wahaha !! feel so proud now.. kekeke..
only thing i dun like is the traffic light... have to stop and wait in free gear mode... then when the light turned green so nervous pull here pull there press here press there dont pull this dont pull that dont press this dont press that.. @_@ so hor.. in the end the traffic light almost turn to orange oni i go... wahaha the cars at the back sure cursing me.. evil little me xP macam mr. bean !
after 2 hours i drove home.. reli on the stering until i reach my house... syok la that feeling.. on the way passed by some yuhua students saw me.. hohoho shuang ! feel soooo .... aiya syok la ! xD
learnt a lot for a first timer.. hehe act pro liao... tmr will be my 2nd lesson.. gambateh !
i was hyped up to go bowling tmr with frens.... initially wanted to go last week but not enough ppl so rescheduled to tmr lo...but then i got a call frm john in the afternoon.. he said the other guys r not goin.. and yihwen still thinking bout it..
actually i adi sensed somethin will go wrong since yesterday.. haih... my 6th sense so ''zhun'' ><''
i sms sum and kaasian see if i'll still have a slight chance to persuade them into joining us.. sum~NO... but sian said she'll ask her mum... waiting for her reply... i tot i still got hope...
then u know la wat happens next.... haih.. one word.. DISAPPOINTED !!!!! T^T
we only got 3 person left.. john , edwin & me.. wat the heck... 3 person no fun ma... so cancelled lo...
oh yeah ! did i mention theres a pilot ?? PENT LOK... incase u guys duno... its LOK CHEN YUE... he arrr... he say he'd rather go for sauna.... humph !! put aeroplane.. bad bad pilot !!!
yorrrr !! i've been looking 4ward to this since last week leh.. hate this feeling.. u know.. its like when u feel that u're gonna make it to heaven , then suddenly something dragged u down to hell....
this incident gave me some side effects la.. i dun wanna organize any gatherings anymore.. twice in a row is already too much..
iiissshhh !! wat to do ?? complain here and thats it ba.. forget bout it and look forward..... at least i know i still have some other frens to make my day.... jilien , tmr its up to u to make me feel better liao... =]
Posted by
